Wednesday, October 22, 2014

This Bro Has Had Sex With Over 700 Cars

SourceOver the last 45 years Edward Smith has bedded nearly 1,000 lovers, but only one has been a person - the rest have been cars. The 62-year-old from Yelm, Washington, United States is a mechaphile - meaning he is sexually attracted to machines. His unusual conquests have included roaring Mustangs, luxury Jaguars and even attack helicopters.
I actually don't know what to say about ole Eddie. You mean you get it on with cars??? WHAT????????? Do you put your dick in the tail pipe? Legitimately confused right now. How does one have sex with a car? I'm not buying this whole you stepped outside one night and you wanted to caress your neighbors car. What an absolute FREAK. I don't know if anyone else watches Strange Addictions but one guy had an addiction of boning his car too. Where in the world do these people come from?!?!?!!?!? I'm so interested to know where these people come from? 
If you can make it through this video without crying laughing, you're a freak. I get some people name their cars, ok that's not too weird. But you kiss your car and have sex with it? That car isn't even nice bro, get the frigg outta here. At least your buddy Ed has a good taste in cars, ya know jags, mustangs those luxury mobiles. Not some shit box you bought used like this creep. Be weirder, you can't. I can't believe Eddie has sex with helicopters. I bet to Ed the helicopter is that bad ass dude that rides a motor cycle that all the girls wanted to bang. Eddie is goin' for all the bad bitches. These two dudes are SO FAR from basic, i can't even handle it. Another thing I've learned about Eddie from these pictures if he also has a strange obsession with Lion King. I think he's officially the weirdest person alive. Imagine if a guy had sex with over 700 girls? Ed is SUCH a slut. Chill out bro, I think it's time for you settle down and wife one of these girls up like our boy on TLC did. You can't go around banging every car you want without facing any repercussions, besides being a huge freak. 

Don't ever let someone tell you that you aren't a freak, because you are.
 Eddie the ripper looking over past loves
Do you like when I touch you like that?
Having a drink with bae after sex

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